Daletoons Store


View more gifts at Zazzle.

DALETOONS ARE HERE AND SO ARE YOU

No matter how you wound up here, I hope you enjoy your stay.
Please click on images to view enlargements –Dale

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

When Harry Met Nancy

With Harry bringing the brass ring so close, who can blame the speaker for being overcome by paroxysms of power. After pretending astroturf outrage and quivering with phony fear of violent Tea Partiers, Nancy finally has a real emotion... or is it? –Dale

This new healthcare bill looks marvelous…if you’re into that sort of thing, but wouldn’t you like to be a fly on the wall at the after passage party on Capitol Hill? Thanks to this little image, you can be. WARNING: May not be suitable for literate viewers. -All Right Magazine

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Star of Bethlehem

As it turns out, the Three Wise Men weren’t the only ones who traveled long distances to greet their newborn king. But there was one guy there who was a little confused about who the real king was. –All Right Magazine

Wise men... three out of four ain't bad. Have a joyous Christmas. –Dale

Friday, December 11, 2009

Pandamournium

Kids say the darnedest things, but this time it’s mommy who says just a little too much when asked the time honored question, “Why?”.
– All Right Magazine

Sadness engulfs the Panda compound at the Smithsonian National Zoo in Washington, DC, as a tearful crowd of priority challenged gawkers say goodbye to the only success coming out of DC in recent memory. –Dale

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Leaving With Ed

In the wake of Climategate, what’s an environmentalist to do? A couple of leading experts explore the options here. – All Right Magazine

With the exposure of the IPCC science fiction scandal, all is not well in Ecoville. Here we see the high priest of Climate Change breaking the bad news to his most ardent true believer. A word to the wise: cash in your carbon credits now. –Dale

Inspired by a very funny article from my friend Burt Noyes at American News Blog. Article here: Environmentalist Ed Begley Jr. Attempts Suicide with Electric Car : American News Blog

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Sarah Para Bellum


Move over, Rosie the Riveter. Here comes Sarah, and it’s not just rivets she’s packing. –All Right Magazine

No matter how you feel about Alaska's former governor, everyone has an opinion. Today, America is arguably in peril from forces potentially as destructive as Nazi Germany and Imperial Japan. During WWII Rosie the Riveter kept 'em flying, and today when most of our "conservative" leaders are majoring in hand-wringing, the girls are stepping up. –Dale

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Joe Mein

The Vice President is home alone again, and he's busy spreading international good will and stimulus cash. At least his favorite Chinese restaurant has a legitimate street address.

–Dale

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Fort Diversity

A Muslim in the U.S. military — a danger? Who could have thought it possible? If only all those hours of diversity and tolerance training worked both ways…

The religion of "peace" strikes again, and our leaders tap dance to the tune of political correctness. May the living and true God comfort the families of the fallen at Fort Hood, and bless all those in uniform who serve our nation in defense of liberty. The least of them is far more valuable than all the mealymouthed politicians in the world.
–Dale

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

RadMen

The Virgina and New Jersey Plans are not just for Constitutional Convention buffs anymore. After the mid-mid-term elections in those states, might the President be rethinking all that whistlestop touring, or all those radical associations?

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Nosferatool

He is the Prince of Political Correctness, and he wants to suck your…bloody freedom of speech. This one’s going to take a lot of garlic.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Fourth Estate Hunt Club

Release the hounds! There’s a hunt underway for a very wily fox, and red truly is Rahm Emanuel’s color.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Queer Eye for the Small Fry

Safety first, or at the very least, safety second — right behind propaganda. Here’s another gem of a czar brought to you by the Barack Hussein Obama Youth, MMM, MMM, MMM.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Habitat for Hilarity

You can learn a lot from a dummy. For example, you can learn how not to treat certain unalienable rights. And now for the Great Peanut Puppet Show. Terry Fator, eat your heart out.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Enriched Iranium

Between the cat-and-mouse and the cloak-and-dagger, the nuclear shell game in Iran grows more and more dangerous with each passing moment. No one has been able to say definitively that Iran is attempting to build “the bomb.” Until now. All Right Magazine has uncovered irrefutable truth that Ahmadinejad is going green in the worst way possible.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Hollowood RED Carpet

Michael Moore is at it again. This time, in the wake of the G20 Summit, he’s taking on the root of all evil. No, not America, although it’s a close second, but capitalism. Oddly enough, though, the movie ticket is not free to the public.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Chamberpot Dome Scandal

In The District of Columbia, people peddle muck by the gross. Enter the ultimate muckrakers of cable television. No, not coverage of the House on C-SPAN but the hard-to-miss show Dirty Jobs. The hit series might just make Joe Wilson a star.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

The D-Con Con

Once the “truth” came out about a “truther” czar, in the Obamanov Dynasty, he had to go. However, the commander-in-chief had a few kind words to say as he packed up his desk. See the footage here.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Enchanted Interrogation

Might it not be true that one can catch more flies with honey flavored tea? It’s a new experiment that this administration is willing to try to get the information necessary to win the Overseas Contingency Operation on Terror. But beware. “Torture” comes in many flavors. See the latest torture abuse pic here at All Right Magazine.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Beach Vacation

With all the jet-setting to civilized Eurotopias like Germany and France, the Obamas forgot just how grotesque the average American could be, even in the “nicer” parts. Now they’re left wondering how to beat a hasty retreat from a vacation in the sticks.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Wrong Number

The Administration is busy crunching the numbers for the next budget, and frantic phone calls are being made all over D.C. One in particular might just be the most expensive phone call in the history of telecommunication. And it’s even worse because the White House is calling collect.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Rat-out-to-me

HEY, KIDS!!! Now that the back-to-school rush is in full swing, here’s your first assignment. You even have a friendly little furry cartoon friend waiting for your submission, emphasis on submission.

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Regurgulous

Bill Maher has just launched a new straight to DVD video mocking religion, and it is brought to you by the letter “B.”

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Suds Summit

Nothing de-escalates a situation like beer…according to the President of the United States. That’s why he’s invited his favorite prof and the cop he hates most to the White House for a whale of a good time. It gives a whole new meaning to “Protect and Serve.”

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

A Clear and Transparent Danger

Does anyone still remember that campaign promise about transparency and posting detailed administration plans on the Internet? Well, then give credit where it is due to the Obama team. The health care plan is going to be posted online, and we have the exclusive footage of the President’s introduction to it.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Fuzzy Lawgic

Digging deep into the archive, we have uncovered a Sotomayor ruling that no one in the mainstream media will cover. If you thought the firefighter ruling was a shocker, wait until you see this “Wise Latina” classic.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Just Plain Palin

Now that the frivolous ethics complainers don’t have Sarah Palin to kick around anymore, the former Veep candidate will have a lot of extra time on her hands for big game hunting. Odds are that she’ll make big trouble for Moose and Squirrelly Dems.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Dependence Day

Just in time for the Fourth, here’s a special People’s Republic broadcast from the Exalted Leader himself, Kim Jong Il…and we do mean Il, mentally that is.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

QVC via ABC

You may have thought that the chance to get your Obama commemorative plate had passed you by, resulting in a bad case of window shopper’s regret, but not to worry. QVC has rushed to the rescue, pulling out all the stops to make your very own presidential place setting a reality. And that’s not all, because they have partnered with ABC to increase buying power, you can even buy your health insurance there. It’s something you’ve got to see to believe.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

DeprAVEd

Besides staffs of writers who do all the real work, how do these late-night comics come up with all those knee-slapping, punch-you-in-the-stomach zingers? It’s all about the right attitude, baby. David Letterman reveals his secret here.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Angel of Debt

If we are going to have government health care, we need proof that it will work. Ergo, future state doctors have been working around the clock to evaluate the status of the President himself. The diagnosis is in, and you won’t believe what it is, or then again you just might.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Kaleeforneeya Dreamin'

Now that the Governator has outdone even Gray Davis, things have taken a dramatic turn for the worse in California, er Kaleeforneeya. Arnold is even rumored to be having a recurring nightmare as shown here.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Hussein of America

What a difference a few months make. During the election season Obama denied any link to Islam, blaming references to it on the Republican smear machine. With the election safely behind him, now he lauds his Muslim roots. What we didn’t know is how deep those roots really are. Get the big picture here.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Pollytechnic

With the economy continuing to hemorrhage jobs, what better way to sit it out than to duck into school for a few years? And what better way to show your hope for change than to attend a brand new journalism school, funded by “stimulus” dollars? Then you, too, can be on your way to becoming the next Katie Couric.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Pelosio

Funny thing about plastic surgery…sometimes facial structure changes irrevocably. Even Nancy Pelosi herself is finding this out the hard way. The exclusive image is here.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Mess USA Pageant

Wanda Sykes isn’t exactly Miss USA, or even Miss California for that matter, but All Right Magazine has uncovered an exclusive topless photo of her, and you’ll never guess what Donald Trump has to say about it.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Double InDIMnity

Think back not so many months ago to the general election and inauguration. One of the big worries was that some crazed right-wing loon was going to go off half-cocked (thanks to that pesky Second Amendment) and make President Obama fall in line with Lincoln, Garfield, and Kennedy. But those people never stopped to consider the other important line that would prevent such a tragedy from ever taking place.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Supreme Courting

One of the cornersotnes of the Obama administration is a continual worldwide apology tour. The great object for which this policy was formed is to make the leaders of other nations around the globe like America, again — if they ever liked America. Lo and behold the policy is working, and the results are surprising. See exclusive coverage of Obama’s latest convert here.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Man-caused Disasters

That wacky Department of Homeland Security is at it again. You might remember how returning veterans were put on the terrorist watch list, but you’ll never guess who’s on it it now. MSNBC has just broken the story wide open.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

B.O.'s Dog BO

When Barry looked at Michelle with those big brown puppy-dog eyes and asked for a pet, the First Lady warned him that pets were a big responsibility. As people who want something often do, he shrugged off the warning, and now look what the First Pooch has done.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Let's Do Launch

Those East-West relations can be tricky. Translations alone can cause huge problems in the cultural understanding department, and the recent miscue at the Secretary of State’s office is no exception. One little word can make all the difference, as Hillary Clinton just discovered.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Let Them Eat Cash

With hyperinflation just around the corner, it’s time to decide now what to do with all those useless dollars after their circulation. Fortunately, however, you do have some options now that the government is taking over private corporations. Here’s a suggestion for putting food on the table in the new economy.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

New OS for U.S.

As we have seen, several Obama appointees have notorious backgrounds, some with tax problems, at least one with a womanizing ex-President spouse, and now White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs has had a run-in with someone from his past. Luckily for Gibbs, it's just a case of mistaken identity.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Prompt and Circumstance

Only recently did much of the American public come to realize the extent to which Presdient Obama relies on a teleprompter to deliver all those rousing, hopeful, and ever changing speeches. But as it turns out, we still don’t know the half of it. Here’s an exclusive look into Obama’s teleprompter use on a day-to-day basis.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Weak End at Bernie's

Bernie Madoff made off with $50 billion, but now that he’s done his “perp walk,” he’ll have a lot of time for prison handicrafts. See his very first convict art project here.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Grand Theft Autocrat

Ah, the historic presidency of Barack Obama. Remember his own comparisons of himself to JFK and Lincoln? Move over Jefferson, Obama is movin’ on up.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Glenn Bleak

An important message from Glenn Beck you can’t afford to miss. You could wait until tomorrow to read this, but the world might not be here tomorrow. Read it now.

Monday, February 23, 2009

TimboTax

Ever wish you could save as much on taxes as Tim Geithner? Would you like to understand what in the world TARP is? How would you like to figure out what makes Joaquin Phoenix tick? Now you can do all this and more with this new computer program. John Scherer, eat your heart out.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

DOPE

Impeached, abandoned even by the likes of other Chicago politicians, and unable to procure an endorsement deal with Head and Shoulders, Rod Blagojevich continues to bombard the airwaves with his claims of innocence. He’s even sunk so low as to appear on the Fox News primetime lineup, something no self-respecting liberal can usually stomach. However, give his PR company credit. Blago has just launched his brand new innocence poster. See it first here.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Rush to Judgment

Rush Limbaugh has finally offered an explanation and a clarification and the now infamous line “I hope he fails,” of course referring to Barack Obama. Is it possible that millions of EIB listeners and liberal bloggers simply misheard the radio legend? Get the facts here.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Senatorella

Rumors are running rampant in the Empire State in the wake of Caroline Kennedy’s bombshell announcement. What type of personal embarrassment could she be avoiding? Get the exclusive here.